We women of a certain age, often have these conversations with Significant Others:
~~~~Upon arising from bed this a.m. (I had been up for hours), my husband treated me to this conversation which, in its own way, is pretty funny.
Him: Why are you up so early? (As he staggers towards the bathroom)
Me: The cat tried to eat my head. Why are YOU up?
Him: (stopping in mid wobble) Because I have to pee.
Me: Why didn’t you just go in my bathroom (which is right off the bedroom, and requires no more than about 3 steps)?
Him: I just like to do things differently every day. (as he continues his stagger)
Me: (Sotto voce) You’re weird.
Him: What? (from behind closed bathroom door)
Him: You said I’m weird.
Me: (triple forte) Why can you hear that and not hear anything I scream at you????
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~Contributed by Anonymous, who, as we all know only too well, was a woman.